Life is hard enough without having to put up with another’s misery. If you are in a bad relationship and are struggling with whether to leave it or not, ask yourself these questions:
Am I happy?
Do I laugh with him/her?
Do we share similar life goals?
Do I find myself wishing if they would just change then things would be great?
Do I feel jealous of single friends or friends in happy relationships?
Am I the person I want to be in this relationship?
Am I a good partner?
What would my life be like if I were to wake up with this person 10 years from now?
If any of your answers scare you- keep reading!
There are many reasons people stay in a bad relationship: time already invested in the relationship, Catholic guilt, fear of being alone, fear of hurting the other, fear of the other’s reaction, fear of change, staying for the kids. These reasons we create in our mind can become our own prison.
As scary as change can be, staying for the wrong reasons can be scarier.
Here are some steps to summon the courage to leave a bad relationship:
1. Know that you deserve to be happy. Find friends that will validate this truth for you if you can’t believe it yourself.
2. Decide that you are not going to lose one more moment of your life in this bad relationship.
3. Make a plan. Decide what you want your life to look like and write it out.
3. Get support. Reach out to a trusted friend for support. Share your plan and ask for help.
4. Set a date. Be specific with a time and stick to it.
5. Push through your fear and do it anyway. Know that as hard as these steps to leave can be, staying in a bad relationship will be worse.
6. Congratulate yourself! Many people feel shell shocked after leaving a bad relationship. Rebuilding may not be easy. Give yourself credit for saving your life.
7. Allow yourself to be happy. Find joy in the little things. Make your home reflect yourself. Be creative.
8. Work with a professional. A therapist or coach may be able to help you see how you may attract bad relationships. Removing personal roadblocks to happiness can help you attract happier relationships in the future.
Life is short; don’t waste another minute being miserable.
Tracey Ashcraft, MA, LPC is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Coach. She has helped hundreds of people reduce stress. As a result these people are learning to take better care of themselves and are enjoying more fulfilling relationships and happier lives. To set up your free phone consultation call 303-668-5995 or drop us a line here.